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Fraudulent Fertilisation

Episode 12

Ricardo Ludovico Gulminelli

Global Fiction

First publication: May 2002

http://badosa.com/n145-13

That was the beginning; everything else happened at breakneck speed.

Perhaps Roberto’s emotional neglect, his fifty years, his desire to live each instant with intense profundity, or perhaps simply the irresistible beauty of Alicia, made him as enthusiastic as a schoolboy. Although he wasn’t a schoolboy, which is why, in spite of his excitement about her, his reflective nature tried to intervene, to analyse what was happening. But the volcano of his emotions was in eruption at last. He didn’t think, or didn’t want to think, that there was anything abnormal or despicable in the girl’s attitude; he decided that her behaviour was natural and sincere. Ironically, Burán wasn’t wrong; she felt completely comfortable with him, there were moments when she even forgot that she was carrying out an unfortunate mission. Because she found it hard to accept her degradation, unconsciously she preferred to deny the reality. When the moment came to go to bed with him, to be the recipient of his semen, she would simply restrict herself to coldly fulfilling her promise and saving her sister. She couldn’t allow anything to harm her. The truth was, suddenly, the two of them found themselves conversing as if the rest of the world didn’t exist. Roberto’s friends didn’t come back. Guillermo simply disappeared. Little by little, Alicia covered everything; she contained many things that Roberto appreciated. The sensations she offered him satisfied his thirst for sincerity, emotion and unselfishness. Although Burán was used to controlling himself, this time he let himself get carried away by his emotions, by the wonderful spirituality that emanated from Alicia. The experience was so comforting that it justified itself; to stop and reason at that moment would have been as stupid as doing so in the middle of an intense sexual encounter. Roberto was happy for a moment upon discovering her, enjoying her deliciously through all his senses. They left the restaurant, united by a mysterious bind of affection as perceptible as the darkness itself. He was dazzled. The magical presence alone of Alicia had radically changed his world. The breeze carried unknown perfumes; everything seemed clearer, more brilliant. He felt capable of journeying through the night until the sun came up, of exploring new territories, of experiencing new sensations. He appreciated clearly just how much he had been lacking affection; the hermetic seal of his soul, how invaluable it was for him to have found someone who awakened his anaesthetised feelings. The two of them walked along the promenade, along the old esplanade that had witnessed his childhood, and that now welcomed him in maturity. He was the same, identical substance; only a stranger could see the difference between the boy and the man. He recalled and felt the truth of that sentence: ‘the old man is simply an older adolescent’. Would it be possible to feel again? Perhaps the passionate phase of his life was not over? Perhaps his nature was not quite so rational?

“Sweet Alicia,” he thought, “I’ve got a lot to be grateful to you for, even if it’s only for tonight...”

The walked for hours. They reached Playa Grande, came back as far as Torreón del Monje (an imitation castle at the end of the nearest bay). That is where Mar del Plata’s busiest beaches are to be found. With each step they felt more united. Roberto took Alicia’s hand; she expressed her consent by squeezing his. They didn’t move any closer, neither of them felt the desire to cross those limits. From time to time Alicia remembered, in sudden flashes of memory, that he would soon be her victim, but she pushed that idea aside; she told herself she would forget it for that night.

“Tomorrow will be different,” she said to herself, “I’ll face up to the painful situation; I’ll trick him.”

Translation: Peter Miller (© 2002)